In which S is just WEIRD.

I recently came home from being gone for a little while to notice that my Social Security card had moved from my nightstand to my desk.

M: Why did my Social Security card move?
S: It's pretty. I carried it around for a few days because I liked it.
M: It's blue. Just blue.
S: I know, but it's a really pretty blue!
M: ...Holy crap.

In which S is confused about Kurt Cobain

Recently, S and I went to the library to return a couple books. One of these was a book called "Heavier than Heaven" which has a photo of Cobain on the front of it.

S: He's going to be in a movie soon.
M: What??
S: Yeah. I saw a poster for it.
M: Umm, no, he's been dead for, like, 13 years. They are making a movie about him.
S: No, who is this? He's going to be in it.
M: THAT IS KURT COBAIN. I CAN PRETTY MUCH PROMISE HE ISN'T GOING TO BE IN IT.
S: Oh. I still think you are wrong.

In which S tells a story

S and I went to Wendy's today.

S: This one time, when I was in high school, I got a Frosty Float.
M: Oh?
S: ...
M: ...And?
S: No, that was it.

In which S is CLUELESS.

S: You work at the Internet, right?
M: ...What??
S: The Internet? You work at the Internet?
M: What? You mean...?
S: A network equals the Internet? You have a network at work, so you work for the Internet.
M: Umm, the Internet isn't a company, you can't really, technically work AT the Internet...

In which S is confused about how garbage works.

I was making some mashed potatoes and noticed a pile of TV dinner boxes and things under our sink.

M: Why is there a pile of garbage right next to the empty garbage can?
S: Because if I put that stuff in the garbage can, it fills up too fast.
M: ...That’s what garbage cans do. That’s when you empty them.
S: But it’s a lot more work.
M: It is somehow less work to throw it all on the floor and then have to pick it all up later and move it into the garbage can?
S: …Yes.

In which S plays a new game

S and I went to T's house to play Guitar Hero II last night.

S: Are there any country songs we can do?
M: No...they are all metal-type songs.
S: But they use these things in country songs too!
M: What things?
S: These...things. This thing I'm holding.
M: A GUITAR???

In which S fails to look at the mirror for the first time in her life

I wrote my work schedule on the mirror in our room so S would stop asking me when I worked. And yet, we have this exact conversation every single day at around 3 pm:

S: Are you working today?
M: Yes. See? On the mirror? It's Thursday.
S: Oh. What time are you working?
M: Do you see what it says right below "Th?"
S: ...No.

In which S has the memory of a goldfish

S got a job and wears professional dress to work.

S: How old do I look? How old do I look?
M: Um...nineteen?
S: I can't remember how old I am!
M: What?
S: I just feel like I'm 24!
M: ...Toootally understandable, sure.